


My Fear of Losing You

by ChaosController



Category: Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Little bit of Fluff, M/M, Possession sort of, analogical - Freeform, but he needs to be there, i guess, i'm sorry for adding an OC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 02:32:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11049465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaosController/pseuds/ChaosController
Summary: Everybody has a fear, what if yours just so happened to come true?Fear is strong, but logic is stronger.





	My Fear of Losing You

Anxiety walked around the white room, he could feel his mind working as black streaks of fear and nervousness were painted in large swashes. Like a canvas being painted on the black began to fill every available crevice until nothing remained. Smiling at the grim, dark atmosphere Anxiety left the mind space and retreated into the space he called home. His smile faded as he heard voices from the top of the stairs and immediately turned his face into a frown as Roman and Patton appeared. Upon noticing him they stopped talking, Patton saying a quick ‘hello’ and Roman rolling his eyes before they resumed on their conversation. Anxiety willed his body to his room and slumped down on the bed, smiling widely as the dark feeling of sleep spread throughout his body.

“Anxiety? Thomas is having a meeting and he wants all of us.” Anxiety groaned as Patton’s sunshine like tone was pushed through his door and into his room. He sat up and stared at the door hoping it would burst into flames. No such luck, but he’d try again next time. Hopefully with better results than right now seemed to be achieving. Knowing that if he didn’t get out of bed and get himself in gear he’d have to deal with Roman’s whining, again, Anxiety forced himself to get up off his bed, thrown on his hoodie, quickly apply some more eyeshadow for dramatic effect, and opened the door to no one. Sighing he transferred into the room with the others and watched on as Patton tried to comfort a slightly distressed looking Thomas. He didn’t enjoy watching his host suffer as much as the others thought he did. He worked up a quick speech and began to do his job, which apparently was making Thomas’ life miserable. After a second of pep talk to himself he began.

Twenty minutes later he had been defeated and the four returned to Thomas’ mind. Anxiety tried to look as grumpy as possible, disappointed he hadn’t won, but happy his host was still okay. He listened to the others talk before something Logan said caught his attention.  
“He’s still not one hundred percent. There’s still fear in him, I can feel it. Perhaps we should investigate.” Anxiety smirked softly as the thought. He knew that this would mean they’d see his masterpiece, he was worried of course, but he’d take any chance for the others to see his full potential.

The group transferred themselves to the once black room and Anxiety frowned at the now white walls.  
“Where is this fear you speak of?”, Roman asked Logan, trying to keep in a laugh as Logan surveyed the room trying to find any spot of darkness.

“I can’t seem to find it. But I can feel it”, Logan murmured as he walked around the room, circling the trio in the middle unintentionally.

“Perhaps you were mistaken?”, Roman asked, a chuckle rising from his chest, deep and low.

“I have never been mistaken”, Logan muttered, a hand coming to his chin while the other supported it. The three could see the cogs turning in his mind. Patton sat down and watched the logical one think, Roman continued to snicker at the thought of Logan being wrong, and Anxiety lent up against one wall watching as Logan began to pace. Sighing Anxiety let his eyes fall shut when a whimper made them snap back open. The three watched as Logan’s hands tangled in his hair and he fell to his knees.

“Logan? You alright kiddo?”, Patton asked as he got up and watched Logan’s quivering form. Then a chilling sound echoed around them, the sound of a dark chuckle that had no source. The three backed into a tight group as they looked around the room for the source. Finding none they looked back at Logan who had collapsed onto his side, whispering coming from him as his hands tore at his hair.

“Logan?”, Roman asked, feeling more than a little worried and scared for the other persona. The three watched, frozen as the laugh came again, louder and something made a squelching sound, like waterlogged clothing on a drenched body. Anxiety was the first to see it, a dark liquid seeping from the corner of the room and traveling like a snake towards Logan. He almost yelled, but something held him back, it was as if something had grabbed hold of his body with a cold vice like grip and was making him watch. He heard Roman yell something, but it was more like white noise as the inky mixture made contact with Logan and a scream echoed from the logical persona. The others watched as the ink substance quickly turned into a tar substance, covering Logan from head to toe until he stopped moving. Roman swallowed thickly, Patton pulled his hands up to his mouth to stifle sobs, and Anxiety felt something in him break at the sight. Suddenly tar covered Logan was sitting upright. Two white dots for eyes looked around the room. The creature stood and the three cowered away from it in fear. It looked at its hand and a smile appeared on liquid covered lips. It walked over to one of the walls and flexed its hand. It did this for a while until tar claws formed on the fingers, long and sharp. The smile grew bigger as the hand came back and dived forwards, slashing four, long holes in the white, from which a black liquid began to flow. 

At this the creature dropped to its knees and the claws turned back into the tar liquid that covered it. It ran a hand through the pooling liquid before it pressed two hands together to for a bowl and scooped up some of the liquid, downing it the second it reached the creatures lips. Once its hand-bowl had been drained it sat back and the tar receded into its open mouth, until Logan sat there, eyes closed and a dark smile adorning his face.

“I have to admit, this body is something”, Logan’s voice came, eyes opening and head turning to the three, still frozen with fear and shock.

“Logan?”, Patton asked softly, voice barely a whisper.

“Sorry, Logan’s not in right now. He’s…sleeping”, Logan’s voice said as he stood and faced the three, the dark smile widening in an evil manner.

“Logan this isn’t funny. What was all of that?”, Patton asked, shivering as a dark chuckle echoed around the room.

“I told you before, I’m not Logan. I have his body, but I’m not him. All of that…that was me entering him, possessing him if you need a real term for it”, the person that wasn’t Logan, but looked and sounded like him said.

“If you’re not Logan…who are you?”, Roman asked bravely.

“Ah, Roman, brave as ever. Good to see some things never change”, the ‘not-Logan’ said, smirking as he pulled off Logan’s glasses and broke them at the bridge. The ‘not-Logan’ looked down at the puddle, pulling at his mouth to expose his teeth, ruffling his hair a little and pulling off Logan’s tie. “Nice teeth, good bone structure, not too much muscle or fat. You did well this time with my body.”

“You haven’t answered my question”, Roman said, voice almost cracking as a pair of dark brown eyes looked up at him and the…thing? person? he didn’t know, smirked at him.

“I supposed you will all have some questions”, Logan…’not-Logan’, looked at his wrist, his smile falling a little when he found no watch. He clapped his hands together and looked at the group. “I suppose we have a little bit of time before I begin my take over. Go ahead, ask me anything.”

“Who are you? What are you? What did you do to Logan? What do you mean takeover? Why are you doing all of th-”, Roman began, cut off when ‘not-Logan’ held a hand up in a way of asking for silence.

“Too many questions at one Roman. Has anyone ever told you, you have a motor mouth?”, ‘not-Logan’ asked, smirking a little as an angry blush was brought up in Roman’s cheeks and his eyes gave a hardened glare. “Start over, one at a time. Okay?”

“Fine. What are you?”, Roman bit out, almost growling at ‘not-Logan’.

“I suppose introductions are in order. I mean, I know who all of you are thanks to Logan’s memories. Well…I am Fear, you can call me Atlas”, Atlas said, his hands coming up into a prayer gesture, opening as he said his name.

“Okay, Fear, where’s Logan? What did you do to him?”, Roman asked as Patton clamped a hand onto his forearm and squeezed.

“He’s still here. But he’s asleep right now. Try not to wake him Princey”, Atlas said his smirk widening as Roman and Anxiety’s faces contorted in rage.

“You talk as if you know me vile creature”, Roman said, growling as Atlas laughed.

“Have you really forgotten me, Roman? You may not know me as Atlas, perhaps Aloysius or Al for short”, Atlas said as Roman’s face fell into shock.

“Roman, what’s wrong? Who’s Aloysius?”, Patton asked gently shaking Roman’s arm.

“I know it’s been a while Roman, but really?”, Atlas asked, a deadly grin adorning his face. “We used to be friends. What changed?”

“You changed. You vile creature. How dare you pollute his body with your filth!”, Roman yelled, eyes flashing with fury.

“Now, now, Princey. No need to get so worked up about it. See, it’s not like before Roman. I don’t have a body. No body but his. He’s comfortable, a few minor adjustments and he’ll be perfect”, Atlas said, looking over Logan’s left arm with a critical eye.

“You keep your hands off him!”, Roman yelled. 

“Tut tut, Roman. His body is mine now. Can I not do what I want with my own body?”

“It’s not yours! You took it from him! Give him back!”, Roman yelled as a retort to Atlas’ question.

“Sorry, I need a body and his, it's a perfect fit for me”, Atlas replied, sighing with pleasure as he danced a hand over the skin of his wrist.

“You can have mine! Just give him back!”, Roman yelled, struggling as Patton pulled him back.

“Ah, ah, ah, Roman. You see, I don’t need your body when I have Logan’s. His knowledge is boundless and I can use that”, Atlas said as the ink from the puddle began to run towards him, covering his feet in a thin layer as a cruel laugh built inside him.

“Please”, a voice asked, broken and on the verge of tears. “Please, leave him alone.”

“Poor Anxiety. Poor, stupid, naïve Anxiety”, Atlas said tilting his head back and letting a dry chuckle run out of his mouth. “I need his body more than you lot need Thomas to sustain you.” 

“We could offer you something else. What do you want?”, Patton asked as Roman shook his head.

“I want to take over. I want to see Thomas fail, cry, be miserable for the rest of his life”, Atlas said a smile in his voice. “But if you keep me here. Continue to stand in my way. Then I have no choice but to dispose of you all. If I took over you it’d be like controlling puppets. Logan has substance, knowledge, something that Thomas can’t live without. I must say, I’ll miss you lot, but I don’t need you to fulfil what I’ve started.”

“You’re going to get rid of us?”, Patton asked in a small voice.

“’You’re going to get rid of us?’”, Atlas mimicked, his cruel smile returning. “Of course, I am. You think I’d keep something so useless?”

“Don’t do this”, Roman pleaded softly as the liquid around Atlas began to rise in long spikes upwards.

“Sorry, Roman. I have a plan, and I have to succeed”, Atlas said. The spikes bent towards the group and dove. The trio closed their eyes and waited. Until they heard a pained cry and opened their eyes.

“G-get out, of my head”, Atlas, Logan, whichever said, growling with exertion.

“You c-can’t stop me. I am…invincible”, the voice said again as Logan’s body dropped to the floor and he clawed at his head. Tears streaming down his face as the spikes melted into puddles that the trio’s feet.  
“I said”, the voice stopped and the group heard teeth grind together. “Get. Out.”

“I am Atlas. I am…Fear. You…you cannot…cannot stop fear”, the voice said as small spikes in the puddles jumped up and collapsed back into the liquid.

“I said. Get. Out. Of. My. Head!”, the voice yelled as the liquid scattered to the sides of the room.

“Logan?”, Patton asked taking a step forward.

“Stay back!”, Logan snapped as his mental battle with Atlas continued. Patton gasped and ran behind Roman. Logan felt himself regaining control and remembered the tar-like liquid.

“Don’t do this!”, Atlas yelled as Logan’s thoughts rounded on him. He fought for control as Logan forced himself to crawl to a corner of the room.

“You can’t stop me. Not anymore”, Logan murmured and opened his mouth, jamming two fingers down his throat far enough to make his jaw ache and tears sting his eyes. The others watched as the black liquid poured from Logan’s mouth. The man sat back, coughing as little globs of black attempted to make their way back down his throat. Patton was on him immediately, rubbing his back as his throat stung and tears cascaded down his face.

“Shush, it’s alright now. He’s gone. You fought him off. You’re so brave, kiddo”, Patton whispered, rubbing Logan’s back in a circular motion as the tears came faster. The other two watched as Logan cried, Patton comforting him the entire time. 

“He’s right”, Roman said smiling at Logan as he turned. “You were…quite brave.” Logan smiled at Roman and sniffed, rubbing his eyes as the tears began to slow. Anxiety watched with a mixture of concern, happiness, and sadness. He sighed softly as Logan stood and Roman wrapped an arm around his quivering form.

-

“Did I scare you?”, Logan asked as he sat down on the couch next to Anxiety.

“Kinda. I didn’t know if you’d come back or not”, Anxiety murmured, looking down at his feet and wishing this conversation wasn’t happening. He felt embarrassed at how scared he had been for the logical persona’s wellbeing.

“Sorry”, Logan’s voice came out hoarse as if he was on the verge of crying. Anxiety froze at the idea, he peeked at Logan out of his peripheral vision and felt guilt seep into him, gripping his heart with cold talons.

“You…you don’t have anything to be sorry for”, Anxiety mumbled, blushing slightly as Logan sniffed and his tearful lip biting turned into a relieved smile. 

“Thank you”, Logan murmured as he stood and began to walk away.

“Logan”, Anxiety said, watching as the other stopped and turned to him.

“Yeah?”, Logan asked. Anxiety tracked the tear stains on his face with his eyes. Swallowing as he stood and made his way over to Logan. Gently taking Logan’s hand in one of his he brought it up and kissed the logical persona’s knuckles. 

“If something like that ever happens again, I promise I’ll be there for you. I’ll protect you like you protected us today”, Anxiety said, looking into Logan’s eyes as he said the words.

“You…really mean that?”, Logan asked softly, pushing his chest into meet Anxiety’s chest, tears flowing and staining the black shirt the dark persona wore.

“I really mean it”, Anxiety said as he wrapped Logan up in his arms and smiled into his shoulder. He’d never let this happen, not again. He’d never let someone take Logan away. He was afraid of that. Afraid of losing Logan.


End file.
